IS ANYONE A BIGGER ZERO THAN ME?

28 years old virgin

I've never had a girlfriend

I have never worked

anxiety neurosis, therapies and psychotropic drugs for 3 years

I don't have a mother and my father is an alcoholic

I have no friends, I sit at home alone all day and only go out when I have to (to go shopping), everyone has cut me off because why would they want to be friends with such a loser

I am the ball and chain of my sister's life who took me in

even God hates me even though I try so hard, I pray, I read the Holy Scripture, I go to Mass, to confession and I receive the Lord Jesus in the Eucharist

I'm still on the edge of s,a,m,o,b,ó,j,s,t,w,a even though I've been trying to run away from it for several years, but I feel that it's catching up with me more and more and even God doesn't want to help me get out of this situation even though I've been begging Him so much for years for any help, I guess he doesn't care about such a sucker either, or he's simply forgotten that he created me at all

zero self-esteem, lack of self-confidence, loser and asshole, I am a zero, a nobody, trash, I only take away oxygen from normal people

I don't have a pension or anything, I live at the lowest possible cost to be the smallest burden on my family, I've had the same shoes and clothes for 10 years

I dream of a miracle and any help that would help me move on in life and

to break out of this stagnation, but after so many years of no reaction from God and

surroundings and only more problems, humiliations and obstacles, less and less

I believe that this help will come, but I have less and less strength, I want to f,o,c,h,n,a,c,

to sink into the ground, to cease to exist

yes

srun is bigger zero XD